Wednesday, March 04, 2009
No. 224
Whoever would have THUNK that our first snowstorm would create such an emotional "ME" as we are days away from our 2 years home.  As a revision to my last post-  Feb 14th is our 2 yr mark from our court date.  Luckily I still can hear the translator saying our names and announcing we are the legal parents of Cupcake.  Can I have a tissue please????
  


There are certain times of year that draw me to this blog.

From June 1, 2006 when we signed with Alliance for Children in MA through March 10, 2007, I tend to find myself walking from day one to our arrival home with Cupcake.

When have completed the process of adoption there is an amazing about of memories that fill your head and heart like no other memories you could describe.  

There are many people who touch your life who will remember forever.  In addition to our wonderful agency who guided us to our child we had a translator who we have fond memories together.  She sent us a letter recently through another family to let us know she was thinking of us.  We were one of her most memorable families.  She was curious to know how our daughter has progressed.  Elena was a special woman who we enjoyed her skills and her company.

One person who I may not have spoken enough about but I want to mention in detail for many reasons but most importantly for families in the future to consider this a reference is Dr. Sayyad Mouradov.  Here is his email & cell number too.  +7 903966 34 46, email SMouradov@yahoo.com.  We took the selection of our physican to be the most important after the selection of the agency.  Reason being, when you are in a far away country in a different time zone and not able to speak a word of their language you want to know and feel you have all of the confidence to make good decisions.  Like we expected, we had many decisions to make.  Today we know without Sayyad it would have been twice as difficult.  We did travel blind but it didn't matter because we didn't accept our 1st, 2nd, or even our 3rd referral.  Our daughter had a short, simple, but scary medical.  "MOM WAS DRINKING THROUGHOUT PREGNANCY."  Ok, so FAS, FAE and the whole alphabet soup runs through your head with fear.  Sometimes you wish you didn't read so much and sometimes you worry you didn't read enough.  Let's couple the medical with being TINY.  My friends children weigh about 16-18lbs at 6-8 months.  Our daughter weighed 16.5lbs from 15-18 months.  She was just small.  She never made it on a chart until 3 yrs old.  Thank goodness we went blind.  NOw I know something i didn't know then...You must go to say NO.  You can't take a picture or a medical report as a clear indicator on a child.  The information may not be accurate, translated well, or as critical as it sounds on paper.  The doctor held our hands, translated well.  Not only did he translate the language but the definitions of the diagnosis.  Checking on us via email for months to follow was quite impressive too.  Thanks again!

The family we met via the internet who adopted their daughter from the same baby home exactly one year prior who developed the same relationships with the translator and director sent me a photo from the day they met their daughter.  OMG-  She was in the same dress, tights, and shoes that our daughter was wearing a year later.  There photo was a mirror image of our picture.

Often I wonder who is in Russia, what babies are on their way home, and the sad stuff too crosses my mind.  What wonderfully loving babies didn't make it to a loving home like our children.  How many wasted lives?  

Then there is Mary.  Russianfamilysearch.com.  Mary took me on my final journey in Russia to answer the questions that I had to have answered.  She allowed me to create a box of answers for my daughter that will be priceless.  Finding Cupcakes siblings and grandmothers was something I never imagined doing before being a mother but something I had to do as Cupcake's mother.   I hope one day the peace it gave to me will be the same peace I can offer my daughter.  What a beautiful company, story, and service Mary offers.  Sometimes the answers are tough, and sometimes the tough answers give us light but this journey was quite incredible, difficult, and emotional.  I love this topic because I believe I really felt myself on all sides but in the end it taught me the difference between selfless and selfish.  Even though my spouse was sick to his stomach and had nothing to do with what he referred to as the creation of "Pandora's Box" I am happy to report almost 18 months later he found some private time to view the pictures of her siblings, and read the reports.  Most importantly open his mind to find a way to justify this was an important part of our adoption.

There was 3 more quick paragraphs about 3 special friends.  I had to delete for now.

J & L can't wait to see all of you this weekend.  I am glad you could get in one more weekend before leaving for Russia.

Maria and Jeff it was awesome having dinner all of us a few weeks ago.

"K"  I won't ever ask or mention you!


Even though I do not post here often you can see updates of our life at OURCUPCAKE.blogspot.com






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